The RBA Wake

Having woken with a slightly sore back it was time to start preparing for the RBA wake.

Jake kindly gave me a lift to the Hogs Head with the equipment (RBA 44 for the slide show, old office stereo for the music, disco lights for the dancing and some decorations). We then both wandered around the shops a little worse for wear but recovering slowly. Then it was back home to get ready. Met Tim and Simmo to prepare the room with the fab RIP decorations Laney had bought. The party started with lots of catching up and everyone looking lovely.

A short while in and Tim summoned everyone with the RBA sales bell and gave out the awards:

Award for: Most Embarrassing Moment Between 9 to 5
Sponsored by: Dolly Parton
Nominations:
Karen B – for her trousers splitting and being pooed on by 2 seagulls whilst in Portsmouth for a client meeting. Rachel Simmons – for having to explain to the man she ran over why she couldn't put the bike parts that fell off in the bag with the camera she was recording him with!
Cathy Burton – for pouring water all over the client at Brent.
Matt Drysdale – for Natalie shouting across a crowded train platform “do you need a wee before we get on the train?”
Elaine, for being decked by Paul Sanderson for trying to use a laptop without signing it out.
Winner: Rachel Simmons
And you can check out that video on:
http://www.myspace.com/noisynoras

Award for: Most likely to keep you informed.
Sponsored by: BT – its good to talk!
Nominations:
Karen E – daily updates on the state of the toilets, fridge and time until the printer engineer
Hayley Miller for her daily, hourly, minutely updates on the returns record.
Goose for a million and one emails to say he’s awake, going for lunch, back from lunch or going for a pee.
Winner: Hayley Miller

Award for: Least Likely to Take a Phone Call
Sponsored by: Field
Nominations:
Jake – Bury PCT and Erewash.
Phil – Male clients.
Accounts – anyone who we owed money to.
Mandy Moo – all marketing calls.
Winner: Accounts

Award for: Most Animal Like
Sponsored by: The Norfolk Panel (run by a Goose, a Chimp and a Quack)
Nominations:
Paul Kemp – for being everyone’s favourite Chimp.
Angus Tindle as Goose
Mandy Kirwin – for being a Moo
Baggers – for becoming a Quack
Winner: Goose – he even flapped to ensure the name stayed.

Award for: Dumbest Comment
Sponsored by: Sponsored by Cat York who may well have won if she was still here.
Nominations:
Sam & Roy – It’s code - SH-1-T
Natalie for asking Roy to print the white.
Karen B – For consistently asking what year it is.
Hayley miller for thinking Peggy Sues plums were huge grapes
Winner: Natalie Metcalf

Award for: Loudest person in the office
Sponsored by: Simon Driver –cos he’s quiet in the office but not in the pub!
Nominations:
Kate
Rachel Simmons
Andrea Robinson
Mandy Moo
Karen B
Winner: Andrea Robinson – for her wicked (if slightly loud) laugh.

Award for: Long-service award
Nominations:
The runner ups for this award are – the printer engineers for living in the office despite not being staff and Jo Ellarby and Andy Webster for practically growing up at RBA. Donna and Tim with just under a decade each.
Winner:
The undeniable winner is everyone’s favourite Aunty T (Tina Dodds) what would we have done without her.

Award for: Most Inappropriate Comment
Sponsored by: Becky and Karen’s housemate Hamer Garland – for the Date Rape and Clown comments to a new employee that night in the sports bar!
Nominations:
The Tameside and Glossop Questionnaire – for letting respondents say they didn’t attend their cervical smear test because “I was held in an inconvenient place”
Nat – “Do you need a wee??”
Alan – I've got a foot fetish
Celia – for her requests that just about anyone in the company book her hotel for her / generally be her skivvie.
Matt – for telling Karen “Simon said he'd rather have Celia as a line manager than you”
Phil – “for asking the Spanish Sweetie to wait for him in the kitchen” and lets face it many many other comments about female clients and members of staff.
Winner: Phil Back – we’ve actually made the certificate out to the biggest schmoozer / flirt in the office

Award for: Most Likely to Get Kicked Out the bar
Sponsored by: Sponsored by our favourite Hakuna bouncer T
Nominations:
Chris T – for getting us all thrown out of wardrobe on his leaving do.
Sam – Jakes bar, the pub in Lakes, Prohibition (repeatedly) – she’s a liability!
Jake – Hakuna, elbow rooms and Jake’s Bar all in one night!
Webster – being thrown out of Hakuna and for constantly / being ID’d wherever we go.
Winner: Sammy Lettuce

Award for: Person Least Likely to Make it Home After a Night Out
Sponsored by: City Cabs – who can be reached on 0113 256 9999
Nominations:
Iain for trying to cycle home after 8 pints in Hakuna
Dave & Karen – on any night they tried to keep up with Iain
Dan for trying to get into private cars on call lane instead of a taxi and then being completely unable to stay awake past Hyde Park Corner on numerous occasions.
Nat & Karen – as they spend 2 hours gossiping on a step before going to get a taxi.
Sam - because she left hours before everyone else (not of her own choosing) and lets face it is just a liability!
Winner: Dan Fletcher – the boy just can’t stay awake long enough.

Award for: Best Dance
Sponsored by: Alcohol
Nominations:
Pegster – Moon Dance
Celia/PK – Xmas party dance
Elaine for lap dancing at the Christmas party – ok that was the company before RBA, but there is always tonight!
Webster & Jake for their special dance time at the Cottage
Matt Karen Bex Nat "Happy Dance"
Hayley and Matt behind the curtain in the box on the pub crawl bank holiday day!
The Amsterdam crew for dancing to Ghostbusters outside a strip joint at 11am on a Sunday.
Winner: Andy Webster and Jake Gardner.

The evening that followed was more catching up and reminiscing, although there are too many memories to contain on one page, the ones that were on the memory board at the end of the night, in no particular order, were...

Going to the loo for a sit down and realising too late that the bloody huge toilet roll holder was out of paper- thank Christ I'd taken the radio times in with me! by Mr Timothy Neal.

• Karen Bagshaw dancing with two naked nuns in Berlin. by Angus Tindle aged 32 and 1/4
• Sams on / off relationship with the floor of prohibition - yo love you Sammy! Anonymous(I suspect - Natalie).
• Just being part of the RBA family for 8 years. by Donna Nixon
• Hayley and Biba asking me if Paul S was the other 'gay one'! by Kate Storey
• Getting Pissed with Sutherland and Thorpe before I even started. Should have realised not to join. by Paul Kemp.
• Kempys backing vocals to any song under the sun. Anonymous
• Singing 'a bridge over troubled waters' with the harccore 4. As you can imagine it was beautiful. by Andy Webster, seconded by Jake Gardner, (and m, and cat would have if she was there)
• Skinny dipping in Derwent and convincing KB that it was a good idea for her to do it too. by Jake Gardner.
• PKs bum. Anonymous
• Jonny Gingold being told there were three lesbians at RBA and picking Mandy, Tina and Kate as the three most likely suspects. Thanks Tim! Anonymous
• PK thumping the poor computer monitors. Anonymous
• Webster preening his hair. by Andrea Robinson.
• Jake preening his lovely hair. by Andrea Robinson.
• Too many good times to single out. Parties, alcohol, dancing, actually it has to be taking the train to the end of the line in Berlin... even the conductor wanted to pole dance! Good times, Boogie! by Elaine Barnes.

The rest of the evening is best summed up by two words TEQUILA & DANCING

Ah the memories... xxxx

P.S Has anyone seen this Man, he's not been seen since outside HiFi about 3am that night!

The countown to Christmas begins.

We'll Friday 1st December was the Nunwood Christmas do. The Ex-rba's aware of the weekend ahead and anxious not to make a tit of themselves in front of new colleagues decided that they would take it a little easier than usual. Our arrival saw drinks being served by christmassy and half naked man and woman. 6 glasses of free champagne later and the plan was out the window. The bar was also free for the first few hours so add a few glasses of wine and the plan couldn't even be recalled. The only things I can say for certain are that I really don't like high heels, I fell over on the dance floor (technically I was pushed by someones erratic dancing) and I remember enough of the sequence of events and am quite sure everyone else was also sooo drunk not to bee too concerned about what ever I might have said to people.

Once we were asked to leave the bar because the staff didn't fancy staying up all night, Natalie and I decided to carry on with Ian (who works in the London office) at the townhouse. I smashed my big toe on the way (the bruising appeared on Sunday). I bought us each a pint (why oh why can I remember my pin when drunk!?) and then we realised we really couldn't drink them. The townhouse staff also decided they wanted to go home so asked us to leave. Natalie tried to smuggle a pint out but as she shouted across the now empty bar "Oi are you two not bringing yours" the bouncers cottoned on to her plan and relieved her of the pint glass up her sleeve.

The next morning Becky informed me that once again she had heard me come in. More precisely she heard me fall down the stairs (as she said this I had a sudden recollection of the feeling of falling). She heard the thud and as she was about to check on me heard me laughing and saying "no, no Nat, i just fell down the stairs". I now recall lying on the floor chatting to Natalie, as I said earlier I really don't like high heels!

HOLD THE PRESS!

How could I forget!?! November also saw my housemate Hamer fulfil his ambition...He allowed his inner personality to shine through and became Judy (he even made friends with a group of lads outside a kebab shop at 4am!). Hamer you look beautiful :O)

November - unemployment, a new job and lots of fun!

Well in the attempt to inform all of what been going on, i'll start at the beginning - and everyone knows november is the beginning!



With RBA having shut sown on Tuesday 31st October; November saw two (very busy) weeks of unemployment. There was a lot of interviews and some freelancing work to do. More importantly we also managed a day trip or two.

On the Wednesday, Jake, Becky and I went to Scammoden lake for some fresh air and some frsbee throwing. We got to see Becky fall in the mud and a quick stop where Jake grew up and we got to meet Chris the cat and see some beautiful baby photos!




On the Thursday, Tim, Simmo, Webster, Jake, Becky and I hired a beast of a car (almost the size of a tank) to go to Alton Towers (see photo). The park was closing on Sunday so it was Adrenalin week (basically means it is open 12-7 and its dark by the end of the day). Pretty much a fantastic day, you get off the ride, you run around and you get on again...Brilliant! Unless your Simmo and it makes you a bit sick!

Friday was fireworks at Roundhay Park with Jake and Becky. They went on quite a long time and were the same as ever.


Week 2 saw more interviews, some job offers, lots of RBA people deciding t go work at Nunwood Consulting, lunch at Tims, a trip to Derby to see the folks and Nanny, Jake and I writing the Brent report (and watching season 5 of 24).





The Thursday afternoon saw a bunch of us at AMF bowling (see photo - despite Websters best efforts this is just us not the transvestites that were also there) and then missing McFly turning the christmas lights on because we were in the pub!













Week 3 and 6 of us started at Nunwood, having spent the week being disorientated by all the new things, it was time for a bit of familiarity.... So off we went to Hakuna to meet Aimee, Laney, play some pool and have a tipple or two (all togeather now... sometimes you wanna go, where everybody knows your name, its 2-4-1 and they give you free drinks after that!)


Week 4 and I had Thursday and Friday booked off. The events of this weekend were:


Thursday afternoon, met Iain in sports bar to play pool and catch up, as you would expect three hours with Suthers and I was a little tipsy! They it was up to the Library to meet Hamer for some birthday drinks, to be joined later by Simmo for her birthday drinks. Ended up going with them all to DJ Scruff at Leeds Uni. Really didn't know what to expect music wise and really not sure what it was like! Got in about 2 am and woke Becky up as I was shouting woohoo down the phone at Cat.


Friday, got up and worked on Brent, gave Hamer his pressie and the headed to London. Drinks
from 4;30-7 with Jacqui and some of her work mates, then hooked up with Tim Gleed (an old school friend who I hadn't seeen in ages) and then went to Cats leaving drinks in Westminster. Slept at Cats house in Sutton - only due to her sister being able to get us via, tube, train and night bus to the right general area. We were even unable to tell Ben and Craig where the tube was (right behind them apparently!) and the landlady of the bar wished us all the best in getting home.


Brunch with Cats family on Saturday and then into central London to meet Ajay, Goose, Matt and their friend Craig. Very sex in the city and -a three hour lunch in a posh deli / cafe (like an upmarket version of where we went in Amsterdam), catching up on RBA people and learning a lot about the London gay scene (exactly how many people do you think Ajay and Matt might know in common?!) Then it was off to Balham for some surprise parties for Cat, another late night (largely due to cocktatils, although this time we caught the last train!)


Sunday was breakfast at Cats followed by a visit to my brothers new house (its very nice) and a catch up with him and Louisa. Then back to leeds (sorry Heather no train incidents to report!).


The final week in November saw...
Dinner and catch up with Natalie on Monday. Going to guides and staying at Cathys on Tuesday, a drink with Ollie on the Wednesday, shopping and wake prep on Thursday, Nunwood Christmas do on Friday and RBA Wake Saturday, but they're December so I'll talk about them later!

xxx

As Puss Cat York says I’m crap at emailing, the purpose of this blog is to keep in touch with those of you currently living on the other side of the world (and to remind you what real life is like!)

I was attempting to create a website but that didn’t work - maybe one day, in the meantime this will have to do with the back up of an online album for additional photos.

I guess depending on what else develops others may also like to play :O)